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Found it on Craigs List


A young man posted a note on Craigs List asking who the woman was drawing hearts in the dirt on the back window of his car recently. I found the note and knew instinctively who it was. Thinking I was doing a 'good deed', I informed the young man of what I knew.

"I'm not the person drawing the hearts on your dirty black eclipse back window, but I may know who is. I believe it's my neighbor in the Xxxxx Xxx appartments on the Island. For privacy sake I won't say which appartment, but I will say the suspect has long brownish red hair."

He responded not long afterward with an excited email.
"You know something!
I know a handful of people on Naples, but no one with brown-red hair. Unless she dyed it... and is also 5'11 and a ballet dancer...
can you say anything more???"

My response was:
"I don't think it's someone you know. She's rather pretty, between 5'6 and 5'9. If you're home, she just walked past and told me she was going to head to Albertson's to get some groceries. Act fast. She drives a black Toyota."

Again he asked her hair color, and this time, ethnicity. I told him.

"As I said, long brownish red hair. She's Caucasian. Blue eyes. Can't miss her. She stands out like a sore thumb. She just walked out the door on her way to Albertson's."

My neighbor did go to Albertson's. She returned within a half an hour though, and I knew nothing good could have happened. I asked her where her groceries were.

"My check card was declined for some strange reason. I have to figure out what's going on now," and she went inside. She didn't mention if someone had talked to her in Alberstson's, or if she got any strange looks...

Which brings me back to the whole Craig's List phenomenon. If someone is looking for a 'missed connection' hard enough to post it on Craig's List, wouldn't they have the courage to walk up to some girl in Albertson's and say hello? My neighbor isn't exactly an ugly girl. It surprises me that this person, after looking hard enough to post it publicly on Craigs List didn't even make a half assed attempt to talk to the mysterious woman he may have possibly been looking for.

It's no surprise, though. This sort of thing happens every day. Men are intimidated by the power a woman possesses when she walks with confidence and ease. If they see a pretty girl, it's automatically assumed that she has a boyfriend or she's married, or worse yet, just not interested in "a guy like that". Unfortunately this stigma means more pretty girls have to either become overly aggressive to get a date, or they remain single for astronomical periods of time. This is exactly the opposite of what today's culture would have us believe.

I'm not exactly the most gorgeous woman out there, but I'm certainly not ugly either. I walk with my head held high and an air of confidence about me that's undeniable. I'm strong, powerful, confident, and not half bad to look at. Instantly I'm either "bitchy" or taken, in the eyes of every man that sees me. The majority of people who speak to me are either slime ball men who make cat calls and dirty remarks, or think "Hey Baby" is a good pick up line, or some elderly woman complimenting me on my haircut. Do you know what that does to a single girl's Love Life? The term "Love Life" can be flushed down the toilet in a pretty girls world... especially if she's shy.

I do walk with that air of confidence I just mentioned - but that's largely a self defense mechanism. Sure, I can take down a grown man without much force and leave him crying in tears that would make a three year old blush in jealousy (but that's just another form of self defense). I have no problem standing up for myself or defending myself.

People should understand that I'm not aggressive. I am actually very shy when I'm alone. I don't make the first move. I smile a lot - that IS my first move. I can hold a conversation with anyone on the planet as long as we are speaking the same language. I have stories galore and I love to make people laugh - but do you have ANY idea how often it is that I actually start the conversation unless it's someone I know well or I have a specific purpose for speaking to them?

So my advice is this - Guys, grow a pair. I'm not the only girl out there who has felt like this. There are SOOO many pretty girls out there that stay home on a Friday or Saturday night because they don't do the Bar thing, or because don't have anyone to go with. Like me, they just don't want to put themselves out there like a New York Strip Steak in a butchers window and go to a bar alone.

And as for the guy on Craig's List - well, he missed out on something really great.


1 comment:

  1. I always find that "Hi." works best as a pickup line.

    And, as always, I must state for the record, if things were different, they wouldn't be the same....

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