It is not very often that I am able to help someone with an issue in their personal life. Today, I was presented with that capability and I took it.
It grieves me to hear of my friends or loved ones in any emotional pain. When I heard a friend of mine had become depressed, I immediately felt a pain within my heart. I know all too well what it means to be depressed and to not feel like you have anyone to turn to. Even with the world on my doorstep, knocking on the door and ringing the bell asking if I could come out of myself, I have often still felt like the best place for me to be was to be hiding within the four walls of my own room, with no help and no hope. I always felt like nobody would ever understand.
It wasn't until I started writing that I began to realize how long I actually was about that. The first time anyone told me that my writing had changed their life, it was such a startling realization that I didn't believe it. It took me years to action understand what the person meant, and when I finally did, that person became a friend for life. That person became as close to me as family. When I started to become very serious about my writing and began this blog, I was often surprised by the number of comments that I would receive, not only in personal emails, but also in comments on this blog. Somehow, I had touched people's hearts. Somehow my sorrows helped someone else.
Today a friend asked me for nothing more than a pen name. Today, I assigned one of the better pen names I have ever come up with. It was specifically designed for this person, but I am quite proud of it. The name I chose was not only elegant but was designed to fit the person to a tee. It had all of the elements required for a pen name, though I wont be going to detail as to what those requirements are within my own mind, since that make it obvious whom that person was. I also don't believe in giving away all of my secrets. Especially when it comes to writing.
Though I did nothing more than just supply someone with a pen name as they asked, I cannot help but feel like I have done something deeper and more profound. I believe I may have inspired this person to write. And if that is what I've done, then my mission for this year has been reached. My goal, achieved.
Writing has always been very therapeutic for me. It has not always been so for the people that I write about, and has often forced a wedge between us and built walls around us. At the same time, I know that if my writing has caused these many issues for other people, and has only allowed me to let go of certain things, that perhaps it was time to let go of those certain people associated with the stories.
Therapeutic though it may be, it has Also been the source of much loneliness. In the Heights of my writing, I lost one I love, gained someone I hated, and I made many enemies in between. When I write, I become a recluse. I suppose that maybe why I haven't written regularly in quite sometime.
Thankfully, due to the invention of Siri, I have been able to write more often now. It's handy to be able to dictate my blogs to my phone and have my phone write it for me. Not only does it help during my long drives in my many errands for work, but it often keeps me occupied in spaces in between. Each morning, I have to drive into another town to go collect the mail, and then heading to my office and yet another town. Those drives are usually filled with moments of contemplation. I have on occasion written blogs during those times. Unfortunately, most of the ones that I've written while driving never made it into my blog. Those were the ones that I was writing before the invention of Siri found its way into my life.
So, to my dear friend who wanted nothing more than a pen name, good luck with your endeavors. I look forward to being your biggest fan.
Oh! And thank you for always being one of my biggest fans.