WHO is Hilmarj???

 

Author Review: Hilmarj Torgrim - Bridging Storytelling and Scholarship

Based on her thoughtful and incisive approach to exploring complex historical figures, Hilmarj Torgrim emerges as a writer possessing a unique and highly valuable skill set. Her work reflects not only an ability to distill intricate, often convoluted histories into accessible narratives, but also a distinctive flair for storytelling that breathes life into the past. Torgrim demonstrates a remarkable talent for crafting engaging, dynamic prose that captivates the reader from the outset, transforming what might otherwise be dense or dry historical material into compelling, page-turning accounts. Her narratives have been widely described as "fun" and "great," a testament to her rare ability to marry scholarly rigor with readability and entertainment.

What sets Torgrim apart, however, is not just her narrative prowess, but her unwavering commitment to historical transparency and critical inquiry. This is perhaps the most distinctive and defining feature of her work. Rather than presenting her stories as unassailable truths, she invites readers into the investigative process itself, offering detailed supplementary materials such as timelines, annotations, and contextual notes that meticulously distinguish between verified historical facts, contested interpretations, and speculative or mythological elements. Her careful delineation between these layers reveals a deep respect for the reader's intelligence and curiosity, as well as a scholarly dedication that transcends the bounds of conventional historical fiction or biography.

Torgrim's approach reflects a deep awareness of the complexities inherent in reconstructing historical narratives, especially when the figures involved have been filtered through layers of folklore, political agendas, or cultural memory. She does not shy away from uncertainty or contradiction—instead, she embraces them as essential components of the historical landscape. By presenting ambiguity not as a flaw but as an invitation for deeper understanding, she empowers her readers to think critically about how history is written and remembered. This intellectual honesty imbues her work with a depth that is both rare and refreshing.

Underlying all of this is a clear commitment to rigorous research. Torgrim's writing suggests hours of painstaking investigation, cross-referencing primary sources, and engaging with the latest historical scholarship. But rather than overwhelming her audience with academic density, she distills these findings into narratives that are at once rich, nuanced, and accessible. Her work occupies a fascinating space where literary storytelling meets historical methodology, resulting in books that not only entertain but also inform and provoke thoughtful reflection.

For readers who crave more than just a well-told story—those who are intrigued by the processes through which historical figures are remembered, misunderstood, or mythologized—Hilmarj Torgrim offers something genuinely special. Her writing stands as a rewarding blend of narrative flair, intellectual depth, and scholarly integrity. Whether one approaches her work as a history enthusiast, a lover of literature, or simply a curious mind, there is much to admire in her ability to balance factual precision with the art of storytelling. In this way, Torgrim emerges not only as a talented writer but as a cultural interpreter—someone who helps us see the past more clearly, even as she reminds us of its inherent complexity.

Paying for MCAS

My friend Amber and I sat in our usual booth after work, the scent of coffee and fried food wrapping around us like a familiar lullaby. The overhead lights cast a warm glow over the worn tabletop, illuminating the crumbs from a meal we’d barely paid attention to as we talked. This was our ritual—our sacred, stolen hour of normalcy. We vented, we laughed, we unraveled the day’s frustrations and stitched them back together with inside jokes no one else would ever understand.

It was predictable. Comfortable. Until tonight.

I reached for my medication, a motion so automatic I barely registered it. But Amber did. Instead of continuing her story, she just watched me, her hazel eyes sharp with something unspoken. Then, after a pause, she asked, “What does it actually feel like to have MCAS?”

The question landed heavier than I expected.

She knew about my illness—she had seen the bad days, the canceled plans, the way my body turned on me without warning. But this was different. She wasn’t asking about symptoms. She wasn’t asking for facts.

She wanted to understand.

For a split second, I considered brushing it off, making a joke, deflecting the way I always did. But something in her voice, in the way she leaned in like this mattered, made me stop.

If I didn’t explain it to her, to someone who truly wanted to get it—then who would ever understand?

I glanced around the table, searching for something, anything, to make her see. That’s when I noticed the small pile of change from our meal, scattered near her hand.

I scooped up the coins and let them tumble into her palm. “Alright,” I said. “You have MCAS now. These coins? They’re your energy for the day.”

She looked down at them, confused. “Okay…?”

I leaned forward, tapping one with my fingertip. “Most people wake up with an unlimited supply of energy. They don’t think about it. But when you have MCAS, every little thing costs something. From the second you open your eyes, you’re budgeting. And just so you know, a quarter is worth the same as a penny. Doesn’t matter how big it looks. Every action spends a coin.”

Her brows knit together, but she nodded.

“Alright,” I continued. “Let’s go through your day. First—you wake up.” I plucked a coin from her hand. “You didn’t sleep well. Happens a lot when your body is constantly fighting itself. Just getting out of bed? That costs you.”

She frowned. “That’s—”

“Unfair?” I supplied. “Yeah. But that’s how it is. Now, you get ready for work.” I took another coin. “Showering takes energy. And let’s say your shampoo sets off a reaction today—because with MCAS, you never really know what’s going to trigger you. That’s another coin gone.”

I flicked it onto the table, where it spun once before settling.

She was catching on now. “Wait—what if I just skip washing my hair?”

I tilted my head. “Smart. You saved a coin. But now you might feel gross all day. And if your scalp gets irritated from product buildup, you could have a reaction tomorrow.”

She let out a sharp breath. I could see the frustration creeping in.

“Getting dressed.” Another coin. “But not just any outfit. You have to think—will this fabric irritate my skin? Will I overheat and start flushing? Will this shirt trigger hives? You don’t just grab whatever’s clean.”

She stared at the dwindling pile in her hand. “And I haven’t even left the house yet.”

I met her gaze. “Exactly.”

We kept going.

Driving to work? Another coin—because stress makes symptoms worse. Sitting through meetings? That’s another one, thanks to brain fog making every conversation feel like wading through quicksand. Lunchtime? A gamble. Skip it, and your blood sugar tanks, triggering a reaction. Eat something you didn’t cook yourself? Hope there’s nothing hidden in it that could set you off. Either way, you pay.

By the time we reached the end of her workday, only a couple of coins remained in her hand.

She curled her fingers around them like they might slip through the cracks. “So I can either go grocery shopping or see my friends. But not both.”

I nodded. “And if you push yourself and spend coins you don’t have? You’re borrowing from tomorrow. But tomorrow’s going to be even harder.”

Her breath hitched. She stared down at the few sad coins left in her palm, as if finally seeing them for what they were.

Then, suddenly, her expression twisted. Anger. No—not just anger. Fury.

“This is bullshit.” Her voice was sharp, edged with something raw. “You do this every single day?”

I exhaled, slow and steady, then reached into my pocket and pulled out a single dime—one I had kept hidden. “You learn to keep an emergency stash,” I said softly. “You plan. You get strategic. And sometimes…” I let the dime glint between my fingers before setting it down, “you just accept that you can’t do everything.”

She stared at me, and for the first time, I saw something shift in her eyes. Not pity. Not surface-level sympathy.

Understanding.

Amber let out a slow, shuddering breath. Then, without warning, she reached across the table and grabbed my hand, squeezing it so tightly I could feel her pulse against my skin.

“This isn’t fair,” she whispered. Her voice cracked. “It’s not fair, and I hate it.”

I swallowed the lump in my throat. “I know.”

Her grip didn’t loosen. If anything, it tightened.

“I wish I could give you some of my coins,” she murmured.

I blinked. Looked away. Breathed through the sharp sting in my chest.

“You just did,” I said. "As much as anyone can, anyway."

And for the first time, I knew she truly understood.

The Art of Having a Constructive Conversation Without a Dismissive Comment.

 

🧐 Ever posted something on Facebook that’s meticulously researched, only to have someone drop a simple, “Source?” comment? Oh, the irony. It’s as if you’ve just shared a treasure map, and instead of appreciating the hard work and expertise that went into creating the post, someone’s sitting there with a shovel, asking, “But where’s the treasure?” You know, the one that could easily be found with a 30-second Google search. It’s almost like they think asking for a source somehow makes them a scholar, when in reality, it just makes them sound lazy.

📚 It’s funny how quickly people forget the power of their own devices. With the entire world’s knowledge at their fingertips, some folks still prefer to sit back and demand you do all the legwork. How many times have you seen someone type “source?” as if it's a magic incantation that will summon the truth, when really, they could’ve found it themselves in about the same amount of time it took to leave that comment? It’s like calling a pizza place to ask for their garlic bread recipe, instead of trying Google when they could've looked it up in thirty seconds using the same device they just used to make a five minute phone call.

🔍 The most frustrating part? These “source-seekers” don’t even bother to read the actual post. They see a carefully crafted, well-sourced historical post and think, “Nah, I’ll just ask for a citation, because that’s easier.” It’s like walking into a library, pointing to a book, and saying to the librarian, “Give me a list of pages where I can find the info.” Meanwhile, the book is sitting right there, begging to be opened. Instead, they sit in their digital recliners, waiting for someone to do their thinking for them.

📝 You know what’s even more amazing? When these same people would never ask for sources if the post were about something simple like "What’s your favorite pizza topping?" But throw in a historical fact or a scientific claim, and suddenly they're expecting you to be a personal research assistant. It’s as if they think your Facebook post should come with a bibliography and an annotated guide, despite the fact that they could’ve Googled it themselves with ease. Maybe they’re just trying to avoid the terrifying prospect of thinking for themselves.

💡 Imagine if, instead of asking for a source, they took a second to Google the claim. It’d take less time than typing “source?” and would save everyone involved the awkwardness of acting like an entire post's worth of effort is invalid because they didn’t feel like doing the research. It’s not hard to find, folks. It’s right there on the internet. You know, that thing that’s constantly in your pocket? It's got answers to all your burning questions. Google is free, and it’s fast. No need to test my patience with "source?"

🔗 Let’s not forget the emotional toll of being the human Google. Every time someone asks for a source, it feels like the equivalent of them not reading your book, then demanding you summarize the whole chapter for them. How about instead of asking for one source, we all agree to Google together? Maybe the next time someone demands a source, we should just respond with a polite, “Here’s a link to Google. I’ll meet you there.” It’s a game-changer.

🤣 In the end, though, it’s not about the sources. It’s about the digital laziness that’s become part of our culture. Asking for a source isn’t a grand intellectual move—it’s just someone trying to skirt the work of critical thinking while hoping you’ll do the hard part. Next time, maybe just ask them if they’ve tried using that thing called “Google.” You know, the one that’s just a click away. It’s like asking for a ride to the grocery store when you already have a car parked in your driveway.

© ABTS - Share, don’t steal.

#DoYourOwnResearch #GoogleIt #DigitalLaziness #FacebookFollies #SourcePlease

Family Monsters

Familial Trafficking survivors are trafficked within their own homes and communities by those who should be there to care, love, and protect them. As a result of the trafficker being a family member or caregiver, the survivors are never reported missing and there are no reports made to child protective services. There is no one looking for them.

As a movement, there must be a change in how we address child trafficking.

Exploitation of a Survivor

As a survivor leader I feel that it is my duty to inform.
I get regular requests to do interviews, speak or make videos on issues related to human trafficking.
If you request a survivor to make a video, do an interview or speak, please note that this is how many survivors earn a living. Therefore, if You ask for this without compensation, you are guilty of labor exploitation.
Further,
If you use our stories or images in a way that we have Not fully consented to, such as adding to them or using them with inappropriate images representing survivors, such as women or children tied up or in bondages of any kind. Then you are exploiting us for your own purposes without our express consent!

Please respect the voices of survivors by either taking down the inappropriate images, compensating survivors when you ask for these 'favors', and by being proactive by treating survivors as Professionals.

I am disturbed by the frequency I am getting asked by former law enforcement to do 'favors' for them by making videos for free!

Asking survivors to do videos or talks without compensation is another form of exploitation.
From now on, don't ask without first booking a paid appointment.

PAY the survivors!

It's a touchy subject for survivors and an eye rolling subject for others.

(In this post I'll focus on Human Trafficking survivors but this can be for any survivor.)

Many survivors are sick of not being paid. I see their posts and I hear their frustrations.

Trust me, I get it.

How do we stop this?
How do we get others to take us seriously?

First and foremost it starts with YOU.

If someone or any entity reaches out to you to share your story, and they have no funds to pay you or can't meet your price- you have to be okay with telling them no.

Do not waste your time getting upset or giving them a lecture on how you deserve to be paid. Just say no and move on.

Also- don't knock on other survivors who accept the gigs you said no to.

We need to empower each other NOT disapprove of each other.

Yes, you may be a survivor but speaking is a business. So treat it as such. You have to carry yourself in the same way you'd like to be treated.

With respect and grace.
(And no I'm not saying your not doing this. I'm just saying always carry yourself in this way when it comes to you and your speaking business.)

These networks talk about the good people just as much as they talk about the bad ones.

Another thing I'd like to share and some may come at me for it but at the end it's constructive NOT destructive.

Just because you have a story doesn't mean you're a great speaker.

Again, PUBLIC SPEAKING IS A BUSINESS.

Invest in yourself.
Dedicate time in becoming the best.
Don't compare yourself.
This is a unique niche and there's room for ALL of us.
Get a life coach.
Get a mentor.
Go on YouTube and watch free classes on how to be an even better speaker.
If you have the money, go to public speaking seminars.
Moxie Institute is where I went to learn from the best. My mentor introduced to this.
Appearance is everything. I mean this.
When I walk into a room people assume I'm a donor or CEO, never the speaker.
Learn business etiquette.
Know your audience- each speaking engagement that you do will be different.
Know who's hiring you.
It's nice to be paid, but if you accidentally associate yourself with something or someone that's crappy, it can bite you in the ass in the future.

There are plenty of people out there that will pay you for your time and speaking services.
I promise you that if you do these things, you will find them.

Survivors in the Field

Are you in the anti-trafficking field?
Do you employ survivors/lived experience experts?
Let's assume yes, because if the answer is no then… what are you even doing?

When you engage survivors to work with you, it's critical to remember that we aren't a box you check to get your funding. We are the lifeblood of this work. So let's make sure that all engagement with us is ethical!

1. Pay us. Real money. Not in exposure. Not in a free meal at your gala. A living wage.

2. Bring us in at the BEGINNING of the project. We have ideas and knowledge that you may not have and are happy to help you create the best version of whatever you are trying to do. We don't like being thrown completed projects and asked to do a 'once over' so you can label it 'survivor informed'.

3. Our story is our own. Some of us share, some don't. It's *never* okay to ask a survivor to share details of their exploitation for your benefit. Just don't.

This #humantraffickingawarenessmonth let's bring some awareness to how we treat the survivors IN the movement. We are a wealth of knowledge, empathy, care, compassion, and kindness and want to see you succeed! Let's work together so that can happen.