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To Help Another

It is not very often that I am able to help someone with an issue in their personal life. Today, I was presented with that capability and I took it.

It grieves me to hear of my friends or loved ones in any emotional pain. When I heard a friend of mine had become depressed, I immediately felt a pain within my heart. I know all too well what it means to be depressed and to not feel like you have anyone to turn to. Even with the world on my doorstep, knocking on the door and ringing the bell asking if I could come out of myself, I have often still felt like the best place for me to be was to be hiding within the four walls of my own room, with no help and no hope. I always felt like nobody would ever understand.

It wasn't until I started writing that I began to realize how long I actually was about that. The first time anyone told me that my writing had changed their life, it was such a startling realization that I didn't believe it. It took me years to action understand what the person meant, and when I finally did, that person became a friend for life. That person became as close to me as family. When I started to become very serious about my writing and began this blog, I was often surprised by the number of comments that I would receive, not only in personal emails, but also in comments on this blog. Somehow, I had touched people's hearts. Somehow my sorrows helped someone else.

Today a friend asked me for nothing more than a pen name. Today, I assigned one of the better pen names I have ever come up with. It was specifically designed for this person, but I am quite proud of it. The name I chose was not only elegant but was designed to fit the person to a tee. It had all of the elements required for a pen name, though I wont be going to detail as to what those requirements are within my own mind, since that make it obvious whom that person was. I also don't believe in giving away all of my secrets. Especially when it comes to writing.

Though I did nothing more than just supply someone with a pen name as they asked, I cannot help but feel like I have done something deeper and more profound. I believe I may have inspired this person to write. And if that is what I've done, then my mission for this year has been reached. My goal, achieved.

Writing has always been very therapeutic for me. It has not always been so for the people that I write about, and has often forced a wedge between us and built walls around us. At the same time, I know that if my writing has caused these many issues for other people, and has only allowed me to let go of certain things, that perhaps it was time to let go of those certain people associated with the stories.

Therapeutic though it may be, it has Also been the source of much loneliness. In the Heights of my writing, I lost one I love, gained someone I hated, and I made many enemies in between. When I write, I become a recluse. I suppose that maybe why I haven't written regularly in quite sometime.

Thankfully, due to the invention of Siri, I have been able to write more often now. It's handy to be able to dictate my blogs to my phone and have my phone write it for me. Not only does it help during my long drives in my many errands for work, but it often keeps me occupied in spaces in between. Each morning, I have to drive into another town to go collect the mail, and then heading to my office and yet another town. Those drives are usually filled with moments of contemplation. I have on occasion written blogs during those times. Unfortunately, most of the ones that I've written while driving never made it into my blog. Those were the ones that I was writing before the invention of Siri found its way into my life.

So, to my dear friend who wanted nothing more than a pen name, good luck with your endeavors. I look forward to being your biggest fan.

Oh! And thank you for always being one of my biggest fans.


  1. It grieves me if I am the CAUSE of any kind of emotional pain to my family or friends.

    No peace or true happiness ever comes until I reach out and make peace with those of whom I have hurt. Unfortunately, it can be most difficult when it involves family members. As is often said,
    we can pick our friends but we don't get to pick our family members.

    The family unit was so important to God, that HE created it. Perhaps that is why the enemy fights so hard to try and tear families apart with hurt feelings and misunderstandings. Thus the Holy scriptures say: "How can you love not your brother whom you have seen, yet claim you love the Heavenly Father whom you have not seen"?
    If we have not love and charity, then we have nothing.

  2. Life's about helping friends and showing them the kindness from you're heart. And you my friend have a huge giving heart. I'm glad to know you and count you among my friends.

  3. I haven't walked in your shoes; therefore I try not to pass judgement. But because you seem to be a loving, forgiving person, it is difficult for me to undertand the bitterness toward your parents when they seem to try to reach out to you.
    Yes, I read the exchange you posted between you and your mother about the Christmas gifts. I don't understand why you were so willing to accept so many lavish gifts, trips, B&B stays, fine dining, limo rides, vintage furs and shoes from others for your birthday (so close to Christmas) yet you wanted nothing from your family if they weren't willing to give to the needy family you wanted so desperately to help.

    Wouldn't some of the money that was spent on your extravagant birthday gifts and celebration, have gone a long way toward helping a needy family you asked others to help? Sorry, I don't mean to offend but I know myself and some others have questioned this.

    You blasted your mother, yet you were willing to accept the gifts from others. I don't know the ages of your parents, but they won't live forever. Maybe you have good reasons for your bitterness toward them, but until you can learn to forgive and move on, I fear you will never find true happiness. I have found myself baffled by your situation. You look for family members in others, why do you not reach out to your own? Just an observation..........

    I do hope you have a wonderful Christmas, Miss Blackwood.


  4. You're right, Patric. Life is about helping others. And to know that this WHOLE THING was your idea and your idea ALONE is wonderful. You're a kind soul who thinks of others always. What you did for this family in their time of need blows me away. As you know better than anyone, they certainly deserved it - far more than the myriad of surprises I was treated to by you and your family. Someday others will see the act of charitable donation as being something incredibly selfish - Selfish because it makes a soul SING to be able to do it.

    And for my yet again "Anonymous" commenter, I think I've done a fine job of picking my family. The family I chose actually go out of their way to visit me, rather than the other way around every single time. I'm perfectly at peace with who and what I am. Anyone who isn't, I wasn't put on this earth to please.

  5. Amanda thank you for the kind words, but I'm only trying to help those who need it. I have been very blessed in my life and I am trying to help others have some of that too.

    To Anonymous I don't know if you personally know Amanda or not since you didn't sign your name (if I have something to say I always sign my name),but I'm assuming based on your words you do not. e is

    Amanda is kind and generous sole. What you don't read about in this blog is that she is generous to a fault. I have seen her give up her food money to help others when they need it. She never publizes this part and usually tells no one and she doesn't do it for thanks, but because she can help those who need it. I will always stand by her and her generousity.

    -Patric (Not afraid to sign my name)

  6. P.S.

    As for my money spending, I thought that someone who did so much for others deserved something nice for herself. So I threw the party, not her. If you have crap to spew, spew it at me. I think giving someone a great memomry on her b-day was the right thing to do. If I can't make a friend happy on her b-day and spoil her, what is the point of having a single dollar? That's my 2 cents.

    -Patric (Still not afraid to sign my name)


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