Those certain few. Those people so determined to say what isn't true as though it were. Those in the gutters and ditches of society. Those not worth my time or energy... or the time or energy of my valued friends...
They don't see me flirt. They don't see me tease. They don't see me acting inappropriately. They don't follow me to see where I go at night. They know nothing of my personal life. They don't know my friends, my schedule, my plans. They know nothing of me but the person I am when I'm at work.
They see me being professional and smart, ambitious and funny. They think they'll knock me down off my pedestal with their actions. What they fail to realize is I don't even own a pedestal. I have low self esteem as it is. But I'm still better than they are even on my very lowest day.
Why do pretty women always have low self esteem?
We all do. It has a LOT to do with being perpetually single because only the scum bag abusive guys have the guts to ask a pretty girl out. Once with them they beat us until we believe we are ugly so that they feel more secure we will never leave them. It's disgusting. Thankfully I'm not one of those.
For me it's something else completely.
For me it's all about not having finished school, not having a degree, not feeling like I've accomplished anything in my life and feeling like a failure. I have no problem with my looks.
A smart girl like me should have a real career that would allow me to purchase a house or brand new car. A wise woman would have known ahead of time who to disassociate myself from. An educated lady would have the right books to find the answers rather than making it up as I go along.
I'm not a bad person. I don't do bad things. I'm quite smart, witty and sophisticated. Yet, I'm barely scraping by. Why?
Because I love my JOB. I'm good at it. I feel like I accomplish something when I spend time in my office sending emails, balancing the checking account, paying bills and planning events. It's great! That's why I work here - because here I feel like a success. My boss Michael is awesome. My peers and coworkers are wonderful. The two or three nut jobs that try to make me miserable fail to succeed because of the network of wonderful people I surround myself with.
People may talk all they want, telling what they may or may not believe to be true, or even what they wish we're true. The truth is I have a job I love, a boss I adore, wonderful friends who tell me the truth when nobody else will and a life and presence to envy.
They may try all they want to push me off of some nonexistent pedestal, but I have more friends than enemies pushing me up to a podium an helping me to find my voice, strength and faith. A pedestal isn't big enough for us, because I don't stand alone. I have my friends and family with me. We don't need a pedestal. We'll just take the stage, thank you.
Try knocking us off of that.
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My Dear Amanda,
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry there are those who seem to want to hurt you or try to bring you down. As someone who is older, let me reassure you that you must be doing something right or others wouldn't be trying so hard to interfere in your life.
Let me also assure you that not everyone with an Education and a Degree in something is always intelligent or wise. While in college I met many educated idiots with no common sense or intelligence; many of them were professors!
Sure, a good education can be very beneficial and a college diploma can open doors for you at times. But there are thousands of college graduates who go to jobs they hate everyday.
Every now and then we meet people who seem to be blessed with a special kind of intelligence and common sense as well. Amanda you are one of those people that God has blessed in such a way and the things He has brought you through has given you wisdom beyond your years. He has also blessed you with a job you love and people you enjoy working for. Don't allow those few who are threatened by you or jealous of you get you down. As I told you before, I am not on Facebook but I do look at pictures and enjoy reading certain articles on it. I have so enjoyed reading about Bell Event Services and also looking at your many photos, especially Paris. Keep smiling and remember, tomorrow is a new day!
Always Fran
From reading your blog I know that you've had some very good jobs as well as modeling and acting gigs. That's proof right there that you don't need a ton of education and degrees to be successful. It's great that you now have a job you truly love. Don't let anyone interfere with that or try to sabotage it.
ReplyDeleteHello Amanda,
ReplyDeleteThis isn't a comment but just a quick note to say hello and let you know you are thought about and remembered in the prayers of others. You have been rather quiet and I hope you are doing okay. You said it was rainy there but I hope you had a nice warm weekend. God Bless!
Always Fran
Hello Amanda,
ReplyDeleteHope all is well with you. I was reading some Bible verses earlier and I found one that reminded me of you (and myself as well I guess).
"She is clothed with strength and dignity; and she laughs without fear of the future". Proverbs 31:25
Quote that to those hateful, jealous people who try to bring you down!
Have a wonderful evening and may your sleep be sweet and peaceful.
Always Fran
Happy Easter Amanda. Hope you had a wonderful day!
ReplyDelete"For He was wounded for transgressions, bruised for our iniquities; the chastisement of our peace was upon Him and by His stripes we are healed". Isaiah 53:5
How wonderful to know that we have a Saviour who loved us so much He was willing to give His life for us. Please remember He is always with you and He is no respect of persons. His love is unconditional and today we celebrate that He is risen and very much alive!
Fran